Copying the dog

Dylan definitely won the digging competition. He's a natural.

Today was a normal ordinary day and a bit odd after the emotionally exhausting day yesterday.
There's good and bad in a normal and ordinary day. The good was getting to go for a walk on the beach and not having to worry about someone wanting to dig around in my memory and emotions. The bad was a feeling that nothing's changed: I'm still going to have a stressful Easter while Richard's working and I've still got all the washing and tidying and bookwork and shopping and end of year wage stuff and beginning of year wage stuff and the VAT return, and I don't get a cape and special powers with my newly discovered brain from another planet. Everyone's still going to be messy and eat all the food and dirty the place up, and I'm still going to be feeling overwhelmed and no one's going to be able to do anything about that.
It turns out that having an autistic spectrum disorder doesn't automatically give me permission to spend all day every day playing in the garden. Who knew?

I was on a bit of a high still from yesterday but I didn't sleep well last night (which I'm pretty annoyed about - I thought I was going to sleep for exactly a million years), and have had a headache and got gradually tireder and tireder throughout the day. Suddenly at around 9pm this evening I think my brain was hit by lightning because I had a mini meltdown when I saw what Tess had done with everything she apparently "tidied up" in her bedroom. I can't stand mess and clutter and I can't stand tidying it up either so when I've made a huge effort and pushed myself to tidy one of the kids' rooms and make it look nice I get really distressed to see they don't give a damn and have trashed the place and screwed up loads of clean washing.

I think people are going to have to be told that I am not a slave because I make a very bad one.

In other news: Gemma got back from her trip to Edinbugger and has got herself another tattoo. Joel's taken to sleeping until the afternoon and then only appearing for food and Tess has become addicted to Minecraft.
Pretty standard.

I've booked another big sleep tonight. Let's hope it turns up this time.