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'Friday Nicht Oot'

In the auld smokie, we all gae oot fir Friday nicht wi oor wee kilts oan tae impress the lassies. They love it and dress up wi their wee tight skirrts and denim jaykits which is oor nashnul dress fir wimmen.

Aifter the pub, the lads and lassies tend tae gae tae the chipper, where there's aye a guid thing in batter tae fill yer belly. Some fowk hae mars bars in batter, some fowk just hae greasy gloopy stuff that's made oot o' sheep's heids or summat. Oh and broon sauce a' ower it. No' vinegur, which is fur weegies.

Have a good one blippers.

Translation

In Edinburgh, we all go out on Friday night with our kilts on to impress the ladies. They love it and dress up in their ball-gowns and highland outfits which is how all proper ladies should dress.

After the dance, the girls and boys tend to go for a lovely meal in a nice restaurant, where lovely traditional Scottish dishes are served, such as porridge and haggis. A liberal topping of spicy brown sauce usually garnishes the dishes, but not vinegar, which is reserved for our friends in Glasgow.