My how you've grown

29 years old on the morrow. First born, and boy what a traumatic event that was. In reality, it was probably quite uneventful, at least from the perspective of the professionals, but lets face it, as a still wet behind the ears 25 year old male, with no training in the field of childbirth, this was never going to be easy.

All started well. I got Diana to the hospital in plenty of time, I showed her how to breath as for some reason, women in labour are expected to have to be reminded of this basic bodily function. speaking of bodily functions, the rest seemed to be working wonderfully well, which was the source of my first shock, This stuff is usually done behind closed doors, but not when giving birth apparently.

Midwife informed me that she was x cm dilated. I can't recall what x was, but I was led to believe that it was sufficient enough to suggest that the arrival of the baby could be expected in the next couple of hours. Wonderful me thinks, this is all proving to be quite easy really. Not sure what all the fuss is about.

Diana of course was finding the going a little tougher than I was, so at this point, the midwife suggested that a shot or pethidine to help to ease the pain. I wish we knew then what we know now - any form of relaxant, pain relief etc. knocks Diana out. Instead of delivering Rachel within a couple of hours as expected, she went to sleep for 8 hours. 8 bloody hours of me sitting waiting for her to wake up. They even had a change of shift on the ward she was asleep for so long.

Anyway, she does eventually wakes up, makes a bit of a fuss about passing something the size of a melon through an opening that was simply not designed for it and there's Rachel's head, with the umbilical cord wrapped around her neck. I lean in for a closer look just as the midwife cuts through the cord to prevent Rachel from being strangled. Well this thing whips round like a fireman's hose that has been dropped spraying me in blood.

Welcome to the world Rachel. 29 years ago. Where has the time gone?