Colin visits Glasgow

Me: tap, tap, tap (on laptop)
Guy working on office reception: "Col "
Me: Mmm?
GWOOR: come and check oot this burd in reception
Me: I'm a happily married man
GWOOR: trust me, you need to check oot this burd in reception.
Me: you know it's really not cool to objectify women in that way
GWOOR: OK, but before you call HR, indulge me.
Me: OK.....WTF!!!