sunflower for my mummy

Today we said farewell to my amazing and wonderful Mummy. I expected to feel relieved once it was done but I wasn't, I was left wondering how on earth we're supposed to attempt normal life now..... we shall just have to trust in the Lord.

Nonetheless, today we celebrated PP and gave God glory for her life. The eulogy we wrote together is copied below for her grandchildren to read in the years to come:

Born in 1952, Pauline grew up in Leyland. She was eldest daughter to Jim and Marjorie, and sister to Julie. Pauline was a bright and gifted young girl and was educated at Balshaws Grammar, a time she spoke of fondly. After completing further studies in Salford, Pauline was married and had the first of her children, Andrew - she would often tell the story of his premature birth, tiny birth weight, and constant trips to the neonatal ward. Andrew was soon followed by Emma. Both of them kept Pauline busy with Andrew’s near constant demands for food and Emma’s steadfast refusal to eat very much at all. Later Pauline had another daughter, Suzy, a real Mummy’s girl who lived in her Mum’s pockets until now. Pauline married Julian in 1991 and they enjoyed a happy marriage together and Pauline often spoke of Julian’s kindness and the blessing of sharing her life with such a good man. The family was completed with the birth of Victoria in 1993, a playful, mischievous and intelligent girl - just like her Mum. Pauline enjoyed embarrassing her children whenever possible by referring to them by any number of bizarre pet names – Cookie Boo Boo Petula Parrett; baby cauliflower head; two bags of sugar; little pussycats – the list could go on for some time.

When Pauline spoke of being a Mum, her words were filled with immense pride and satisfaction. It was clear to anyone who knew her that motherhood was central to her life, she described it as the greatest job she could ever have. Pauline was a devoted and loving wife and felt blessed to have been given Julian as her husband. Pauline adored her husband and was amazed by his willingness to love and look after her children just as much as he loved and cherished her. Their home was filled with laughter and love, bizarre dancing and the occasional glass of wine.

One of Pauline’s best qualities as a Mum and wife was that she not only looked after her family and did all the usual things you’d expect such as making incredible roast dinners, trifle, lasagne and the best meringue in the history of the universe, but she was keen to also instil in her family the confidence and skills to do things for themselves. She was a wonderful listener and never tired of the details of her family’s lives. She was able to see the potential in others and this was very clear in her role as a mother-in-law, she loved both Jon and Antony and she was instrumental in both of their lives. Pauline was also particularly pleased to encourage her daughter, Emma, into the teaching profession and was tremendously proud of her success.

In more recent years Pauline has been delighted by her grandchildren - Lydia, Eve and Ella, even moving from her long term home in Bamford to Broadbottom to enjoy being closer to them. She talked about her granddaughters often, was excited as they reached every milestone and she so enjoyed being involved in their lives. Pauline was also blessed by some exceptional and steadfast friends. She spent a lot of time with her friend, Margaret, who was her constant spiritual companion and truly the best of friends – Pauline often described her as a sister. In 2012 they enjoyed a trip to the holy land together which was a source of many fun stories and somewhere that Pauline had very much hoped to return.

For all of her family and friends Pauline was chief cheerleader. She was excited by their successes and would listen to details of working and student life with avid interest, probably because she herself so enjoyed the world of work.

Pauline started her career as a secretary including a stint at Manchester Town Hall where she gained a sense of confidence in her abilities as a great communicator. When she returned to work following the birth of her first three children, Pauline began a long chapter of life in further education. She completed teaching qualifications and lectured for many years at Bury College. She loved teaching and often described it as a truly fulfilling calling. Pauline’s ability to teach shone through in both her professional and personal life – she was a tremendously bright woman with a genuine interest in the lives of others. Her career developed into further education management and she successfully completed a Masters in HR alongside her role at the college. A highlight of the later years of Pauline’s career was becoming a member of the Manchester branch of Chartered Institute of Personnel and Development and eventually taking on the voluntary role of Chair of the branch. Pauline ended her career managing Bury College’s continuous professional development department and was also delighted to become a Chartered Fellow of CIPD.

Since Pauline’s death, many of her friends and colleagues have been kind enough to let the family know of the impact she had on their working and personal lives, how she was a listening ear and a great support. In her career and her personal life, Pauline never gave up growing and changing. She was hard working, loyal and fair. Above all she was feisty and fiercely protective of those she loved, particularly her children and her Ju Ju.

Pauline loved holidays including various epic drives to the South of France with the whole family. She also loved spending time in Fowey in Cornwall and visiting her son in Zurich. Buttermere is another favourite family spot and she spent many happy weekends hibernating at Margaret and Peter’s cottage in Ambleside. She enjoyed a trip to the shops, so much so that for some time one of her granddaughters referred to John Lewis as “Grandma’s house”. She liked good food and entertaining friends and was happiest when her life was filled with people. Pauline was full of mischief and fun which is probably why she chose to buy a crazy dog, Ru, a few years ago – he definitely suited her personality.

During the last few years, Pauline courageously faced peritoneal cancer and anyone who has been in contact with her will know how positively she approached this challenge. She never gave up hope and applied the strength and determination that were so apparent in every other area of her life. She focussed on her health rather than the illness. Throughout her life, but especially during this time, Pauline also leant upon and developed her faith in Jesus Christ – she praised God in all circumstances and at any opportunity. God took Pauline on a journey of faith and she fell in love with him more deeply. Pauline even completed two years at bible college, joined a street prayer ministry, read the word constantly, enjoyed attending various Christian conferences and she started a prayer group with some good friends from this church, St Michael’s. Even when Pauline felt the effects of the illness, her response was almost always to quote scripture and declare the promises of God’s word.

Pauline faced various battles in her life but was always triumphant. At this time, as we come to terms with our loss, we must remember that Pauline has again triumphed in Jesus because she is now with him for eternity.