Highlight

This was it. Harper stacking his new blocks very carefully on top of each other. He stacked 4 high at one point. I sat and watched him, clapping when he successfully stacked the blocks, he loved it-he would get excited and squeal then knock them down. Kanye and Marley stopped what they were doing, coming over to join in stacking and making towers. Was such a beautiful moment.

So this morning i was up at 3am- mar woke me because he needed the toilet. We had forgotten to leave a night light on so he could see. I tucked him back into bed after he'd been then stumbled back to my bed but I couldn't sleep. I finished the blip i had started for yesterday just as harper stirred and crawled into my bed for a feed. I started drifting off after thinking about some of the break in the nearby suburbs that have happened lately. Then a light flicked on and i heard a couple of thump noises. I sat up trying to focus where it was coming from- the lounge? Why..? What. ..? I immediately thought someone was in our house. I elbowed andre telling him to get up as i got our of bed. I walked slowly into the lounge with harper still in my arms sleeping- my heart raced. I went in to find. ...Marley. ..... building lego!

'What are you doing? ?!' I said in a less than impressed voice, andre seemed to come into the lounge quicker when I said that. I realized later he may have thought i was confronting our possible burglar. Bit of a rude awakening for him!

Mar said he had wet the bed. He had got up, got changed and come in the lounge to sleep. I was relieved we weren't being burgled but a little worried he didn't wake me- he just dealt with it. Andre said he's probably embarrassed. MY BABY! ! He's only 5! And he's dealing with it on his own? ??

He doesn't wet the bed often -only when he's had a lot to drink and fallen asleep before he had the chance to go to the loo.

We sorted it and Mar climbed into my bed with andre. I would have gone back to bed myself but Harper was now awake playing with his toys, I needed to stay awake for him so I did housework. You heard me right. Housework. At 4am-6 am.

Harper decided near 6 he was ready to sleep again so we lay on the couch and fell asleep until mar got up at 7.

Tired?. Yes. Zombie? No. Mumbie? Mum zombie. Yes? ( Mumbie is the term which defines mama's who have barely slept and aren't really awake but you are still able to feed, dress and get kids to school without forgetting anything) There has to be a part of the brain set aside for auto pilot just for mothering.

My morning didn't get particularly better. My mum had come to be there to put Kanye in the taxi. I was on my way back from school when the taxi driver texted ( which she does every morning) when she was almost at our place. So I texted mum so she knew to take Kanye out to the gate except i got no reply from mum. I texted again- nothing. I thought either she's at the gate and can't text OR she hadn't got the text and wasn't at the gate. I started to panic- i started running. Then the taxi driver texted and then called. I didn't answer as i was almost there. I kept running. I parked the pram by the gate apologizing to the driver as i ran inside to get Kanye. My mum seemed stunned as i ran in. I took Kanye out to the gate and put him in the taxi. I felt so let down. I felt like the only person i can rely on is me. I waved bye to my baby who was waving and smiling at me as the taxi left.

When I got inside i discovered that somehow the blocking mode on mums phone had been turned on meaning nothing came through. No texts no calls. I was just frustrated by the whole situation as yesterday this happened but with Andre. He said he'd get mar but hadn't left in time so I ran to school telling him to wait for Kanye. Andre then turned up at school- i immediately panic- there's no one at home for Kanye (i usually get mar 5 mins early to be back in time for Kanye). Andre left to get Kanye while i quickly caught up with my friend. As I'm on my way back the taxi driver calls and says she's there. I immediately call andre who says before I say anything 'I've got Kanye, I'm here'.

I decided this afternoon that I need to work this out. So I spoke with mars teacher and said for the next 2 weeks depending on Kanyes pickup in the morning Marley will either be on time or a little late and in the afternoon i need to get him a little early as normal. She was really happy with that. I have no choice. I need to get an idea of pickup times and drop offs so I know where best for my mum to be.

The rest of the day calmed a bit so the stress eased but I felt restless and unsettled so I left the housework and spent time with the boys.