Sadness...

Burdened by the story that unfolded (yesterday's blip) the pain worsened today. My daughter text me the news, they found a body in the area that Chelsea had been training. They are fairly confident that it is her. I was so bothered, I fired back a text, 'just nail him to a tree and let the people have at him'. My husband said "Are we to judge? God loves him as much as He loved her". He tends to play the devil's advocate, and I hate it, just be on my side already, huh? But the words stuck like arrows in my heart. Anger, disbelief, pain, sorrow....the tears flowed. He asked me if I was OK?

I didn't know her, we are 30 minutes away from Rancho Bernardo, I have no ties with those who do. I had seen it on the news and right away began to pray for her. But when my son brought the flyer home it stirred my heart even deeper. Yes, God loves those who sin. We all sin, different degrees, but in God's eyes it is all sin. I am just a human, a human MOM, that is trying to make heads or tails of why someone could and more precisely, would kill someone, for the sake of killing.

I told my husband, it hurts, it is sad, and I feel horrible for her family, they had hopes of her coming home, but this won't be happening. This guy had molested and been convicted before, he is back out and on the hunt. I can't believe there are people out there really like that. You should be able to go running, hiking, to the mall as a woman, by yourself and not fear for your life. He said, "But you can't, it just doesn't work like that, we are called to be wise, and it isn't wise".

It isn't wise.

My daughter left the house tonight, to grab coffee with a friend. Will I see her again? I don't know? Do we ever know? It is one thing to have an accident on the freeway, it is another thing to be deliberately murdered. The painful truth, we must be cautious, not all people or surroundings can be trusted

Chelsea, This bright blip is for you. I didn't know you, but found out that your favorite color is orange.

This is for you!

Rest in Peace!!!!