Hmmph!

Mum was looking after Lewis today; Kelly had a contact day at work. I went round this afternoon for a bit to see him. The past few times I have been with him I've felt nothing and had no interest in playing with him or holding him. Today was no different.

I hate how things are just now and I am beginning to struggle with my thoughts. Every day seems the same, I can't motivate myself, I am continually crying or wanting to cry, I feel so detached from everything and everyone and I can't eat anything substantial.

Spoke to the hospital this morning, the psychiatrist can't see me until next Thursday. Psychologist tomorrow.