i'll know my name

"and so we have to say yes to time, even though it means speeding forward into memory; forgetfulness; and oblivion. say 'no' to time; hold on to what you were or what she was; hold on to the past, even out of love...and i swear it will tear you to shreds. this universe will tear you to shreds. " -craig wright, the pavilion

im not even sure i agree with this quote. but its the memory that feels redemptive at the moment. and that seems sufficient. right? right.

i am officially on break and officially very excited about this. as i did not take a break for spring break i am indulging myself and taking one over easter.

easter is my absolute favorite day of the year.

i could not be more excited.

i was reminded of the first easter i spent the way i would choose and i was so nervous/excited that i spent hours getting ready (i was 22). finally i settled on a pale pink skirt and a light green sweater. that felt easter appropriate. so funny to think about that now.

i like these memories.

maria comes tomorrow! perfect timing. so ready. so good. rumor has it that it might finally stop raining too. wouldnt that be a blessing.

---

but i will hold on hope
and i won't let you choke
on the noose around your neck

and i'll find strength in pain
and i will change my ways
i'll know my name as it's called again

so come out of your cave walking on your hands
and see the world hanging upside down
you can understand dependence
when you know the maker's land

so make your siren's call
and sing all you want
i will not hear what you have to say

cause i need freedom now
and i need to know how
to live my life as it's meant to be