Magnolia's in flower

Till Gremlins

There are gremlins in our till,
They are green with pointed ears,
And little beady eyes.
They have been here hundreds of years.

They run around in our cupboards,
Stealing money from the float,
Then put it back in hours later,
And sit on our pencil pots to gloat.

Their main aim is to confuse,
They never use the money,
They just play around with it,
But I don't see what's so funny!

After hours of recounting,
The total always changes,
Oh these pesky little elves,
With their unfair exchanges.

I did not agree to a loan.
I did not sign up to a swap.
We all just want our books to balance,
So can you please just stop?!

Some days I lay out food,
You know, just as a bribe?
But they only want the money,
That unruly little green tribe.

On Monday I found the notes,
All rolled up like cigar.
On Tuesday I found the coins,
Sealed in a tiny jam jar.

On Wednesday I discovered a tenner,
Had been swapped for some yen.
And there was that fifty pence,
Which I never saw again...

I wonder what they do all night,
With the money in the till?
And how do they get inside it,
With those big bags to fill?

No padlock is too tricky...
No code is too hard...
No alarm system can detect them...
They've even crept past the guard!

They are an organised army,
Which one day I'll arrest!
But for now I have to reason with them,
And do as they request.

(Out float wouldn't balance today)