Chaffinchinnatree

Another lunchtime wander down to the Water of Leith, where a robin once again is relegated to second blip-place, and every time the beasties started getting a wee bit closer a jogger would appear from nowhere. Better than being in the office mind you.

I'm trying desperately to tune out of the growing election-fever surrounding everything just now. I reckon TV execs could save a lot of time and money by, instead of covering this election word for word and move for move, showing repeats of every televised election to date. It's all the same bollocks anyway.

You said this but we think that and you won't pay for this but we'll cut this waste and create these jobs and there won't be any sleaze but if there is then we'll chastise you for it and defend us about it and we're the real party of the people and we care about everything but we're tough on the things that people want us to be tough on this week and we listen to the people except when they're wrong and it clashes with what might make us popular with this other group of people and nerr ner nerr you smell.

I hate party politics, and I do wonder if a hung parliament could be the best thing for us (after all Cameron, little slimebag that he is, only beaten in the 'created from the ooze of the pit of satan' stakes by George 'I can make money out of thin air' Osborne, needs a 7% swing for an overall majority, something not even Churchill and Thatcher, Tory bastions, ever managed).

Labour as a 'better the devil you know' option feels like a cop-out, and also gives them a mandate that I don't think they deserve (I don't actually mind Gordon Brown, but the Millibands are a (not genuinely very) red version of Osborne, and Darling's eyebrows are too distracting. The Lib Dems punted on experience and common sense and genuine intelligence and thought to have a poster boy charm offensive with Nick Wossname (Vince Cable proved quite well on the Chancellor's debate that the big-two are simply bandying about catchphrases and soundbites to attract a vote).

The other parties as a protest vote are the way I tend to go these days (no, I'm not going into the SNP, they have the Sturgeon in their ranks, nuff said. Actually, no, let's also mention Salmond's toadying media-whore presence) - but it really is a protest with no teeth.

I'd actually considered standing as an independent this year. Kinda just for the hell of it, see if I could win back my deposit. At least that way I could have voted for myself. But I had a feeling I wouldn't survive with my soul intact - dragged into the nefarious world of political wrangling and point-scoring.

So what to do? Spoil the ballot with a comment written next to each candidate's name? They might wonder why I'm taking so long in the booth. Not vote? I can't bear the thought - I've been given a democratic right and I've not missed voting in a single election yet, plus I personally think not voting bars you from any future complaints about whichever eejits happen to be in charge.

Nope, for the moment I'm going to carry on ignoring it. Read about actual plans rather than listen to soundbites when it gets closer to the polls, and put my cross... Somewhere...

This has been a Party Political Broadcast by the Campaign for Actual Sense & Fiscal Enlightenment in the Control of Kaos. aka Camp as Feck. Ayethangyew.