Not walking

Up until now I have been reluctant to post about personal stuff, preferring to concentrate on describing my progress in confidence in using my camera and developing my photography skills. But those issues I have not talked about are impacting on my blipping, so it is time to explain why almost all my photos are taken in the garden or indoors.

A few years ago I was active and even did such things like doing a ten mile walk (to impress a guy I fancied!), went to demanding aerobic classes, and walked a lot, including to work each morning. In 2005 I started a Media Arts course, a course I so enjoyed, and felt good doing challenging things like interviewing people for a short film, doing presentations, but even during this study I began to experience problems with fatigue, and aches and pains. From being able to walk into town, a pleasant 20 minute walk, I reached a point of having to catch a bus each time, because of dreadful aches and pains in my joints.

At the same time a lifetime experience of on and off depression worsened, to be joined by anxiety, an unpleasant mix of being easily startled, shaking when nerves when getting ready to go out, and worst of all at times feeling disaccoiated not only from the world around me, but from my own self. Gradually, time spent in the perceived safety of indoors became months, and my life has become isolated, hermit like.

All this has been exacerbated through being very ill on the first day of my new course at Uni (going in at the second year) and returning the very next day, which possibly started the fatigue and joint aches and pains (i.e. ME like symptoms), having kidney stones - five in all - and in May last year, breaking my ankle (on the day I started a Gym programme to help me get fit again!).

But here my walking boots sit, bought just before breaking my ankle, waiting to be worn regularly again, a good pair of boots that help me stand longer and experience less pain when walking, and I am so looking forward to well enough to use them so much that I wear them out.