Thank you Saphe and Pake

When I woke up today I felt an immense pain and exhaustion. I knew that Timo was going to Rauma to see his family and his brother's newly born baby. So I thought that I'd spend a day in bed crying and screaming. I wanted to scream out the pain.

I called Barbro and told her about this feeling. She said to me: "Yes, I think that is a great idea. But before you do that maybe you want to post a piece of paper on your outer door, and write on it: Grieving in progress, please don't mind." I had to laugh at that.

I was still in bed when I heard the mail falling on the hall floor from the mail slot. I went to pick the mail up and threw it quite carelessly on the sideboard. There was a small envelope which was pretty thick. On the envelope it said "Artist Nina Lindfors" with a handwriting I didn't recognize straight away.

I got interested and opened the envelope. I was very surprised to find a colorful bracelet made of small wooden and plastic "pearls" of different shapes. There was a little note: "Here is Saphe's vision of grass and sky". On the other side of the note it said: "The bracelet is 100% handmade by Saphe". With love Pake & Saphe. Saphira (Saphe) is two years and a half old!

I got very moved and it also got me a small boost of energy, so I ate, went to the shower, put clothes on and got out to Espoon keskuspuisto. I had my camera with me. When I got in the woods I started crying. I walked and cried. I felt the pain taking over. Then I stopped to breath.

I stood there making space for the pain. After a while I started to walk again. I thought I need to blip. What should I blip? I don't SEE anything, even if it's summer, everything is green, the sun is shining and the bird are singing. Have I lost the ability to see and photograph? After walking a bit I suddenly realized that I want to blip the bracelet which I was wearing.

Usually I get many ideas of how to do a shot but now I was searching of the place and way to do it. Should I do it on the grass? No the grass is too long. The light is not right. How about the path? Maybe with some flowers? No, this doesn't work. Not at all.

Almost at the end of my walk I spotted a moss between the spruces. Great light. Yes. This was the right spot. When I looked at the shots that I had taken I felt very uplifted. I can still make photographs!