Listening

I'm a go, go, go, go kind of girl.

I'm all about planning, action, getting things sorted, arranged, lined up, done and dusted.

But for the last few weeks, months and even years I've had this growing groundhog day feeling. The same people, scenarios and places have been cropping up over and over and I've had this knawing unease - a sense I need to move on, to change and progress.

Despite my best efforts it hasn't happened and my feeling of concern has grown bigger and bigger, to the point where it's started to get me down.

Last night, feeling a bit frustrated about my lack of progress in life, I crawled in to bed and stared at the ceiling wondering about it all.

This morning I woke feeling happy, uplifted and bright. Why?

A dream.

I've not always been a great believer in them meaning anything at all really. But this one really spoke to me.

In my dream I was expecting a baby. It arrived prematurely and was so tiny and weak that before long it died.

But this wasn't a sad emotional dream - it was a matter-of-fact one.

And when I woke up this morning I knew with complete clarity what it meant.

For me it was to show me that the baby needed time to grow and be healthy and it shouldn't be rushed to arrive.

I've been pushing and rushing and wishing and driving for things to change, get a move on and start happening.

But after this dream I realised that I need to be patient and recognise that things will happen in their own time and when the time is right.

It gave me a sense of trust, after all I don't want things to happen prematurely so that they are weak and with a greater chance of failure.

I just had to write about this today because it's almost like a miraculous realisation for me.

And this picture on the wall of a closed florist captured a dream like quality for me.

Today and today's blip seem very special indeed.