Monday noise

I haven't been sleeping well the last couple of days. Have had my regular dose of exercise on wheels and nothing untoward has happened either. In fact, it has all been rather good. But as a result of insufficient sleep, my head was heavy all day today. I felt exhausted; the early morning portion of caffeine, sapping the zing it temporarily instills.

I had to go to the airport to see SM off, to give him the bag and a couple of things. We rode the stretch of 40 km through beautiful roads, as most of South Delhi and its connections to frequented locations are abound in. It was sufficiently late by then for the roads to be relatively clear. In the last moment, S decided to join and we had our second thoughts about not driving. So our cab driver, expert that he was whizzed through all gaps he could find and we reached an hour and a half before time. Then to add to the confusion, we were incorrectly informed about which terminal to be at which is consequential since the two main terminals are separated by at least 6-7 km. All this made for an exasperating wait and I did my bit to shed any whiff of diplomacy to give SM a piece of my mind. Even one of the security, perhaps sensing some irritation with me came up to us to ask why we were waiting so long. I wasn't in the mood to humour him so I answered him in detail in English, a bit too rapid for him perhaps and though he probably had no clue what I was talking about, left silent and satisfied.

By the time SM arrived on a bus from the other terminal and managed to locate us, my irritation had reached its zenith and was happily about to cross over to numb indifference. But well, that is when things changed. And without warning. It was replaced by the happiness on meeting a close friend and sadness at his leaving the country, perhaps forever. The infuriating wait no longer cast its angry shadows. Tomorrow he will be in the country he had aimed for. This will be a whole new journey for him.

But it's that wordless transition in my mind that I enjoyed most. I always place a lot of importance on acknowledging all that we feel, negative as bits of it may be. Acknowledgement is the first step to overcoming any feeling we consider detrimental. Covering it up with a garb of niceness and attempted optimism is not a solution, only a fleeting sense of happy make-believe born our of fear. Faith - now that's a word I use scathingly - is essential for all who embark on a journey attempting to be honest. It is faith here, that fuels the spirit of questioning. And it is this plethora of varied emotion that bring us peace and make us beautifully human.