Drive you Mad????

Why do they call it rush hour when nothing moves?

Nothing confuses a man more than a woman driver who does everything right.

Ah...so many pedestrians, so little time...

There are two things no man will admit he cannot do well: drive and make love.

Men can read maps better than women. Cause only the male mind could conceive of one inch equalling a hundred miles.

The guy was all over the road. I had to swerve a number of times before I hit him.

I collided with a stationary truck coming the other way.

The indirect cause of the accident was a little guy in a small car with a big mouth.

An invisible car came out of nowhere, struck my car and vanished.

There were plenty of lookers-on but no witnesses.

Judge: But if you saw the woman driving towards you, why didn't you give her half the road??
Male Driver: I was going to, Your Honour, as soon as I could find out which half she wanted.

Fred: Has you wife learned to drive yet?
Joe: Only in an advisory capacity.

My wife drives her car like lightning.
You mean she drives very fast?
No, she hits trees.

What kind of car does an electrician drive?
A volts wagon.

What make of car do shepherds drive?
Lamb drovers.

What do you call a country where everyone drives pink cars?
A pink car nation.