Grouchy Groucho

Katherine is 8 days old here, and some friends who were on holiday when she was born have popped round to say hello. Here she is with Aunty Sue.

I should clarify a couple of points before you call Social Services:

1. She was nigh on premature, but super tall - hence the scrawny legs.

2. It was really really warm in the flat - hence the lack of blanket wrappings.

3. The cigar, though part-used, was not lit.

4. No-one smoked near her.

Looking back at how tiny she was is just terrifying. But seemed normal to me at the time. It wasn't until hulking Conor arrived that I realised babies should be round and soft.

(Oh and 5. Yes, we did decorate our flat with Irn Bru colours.

And 6. Yes, someone did buy it without us having to repaint it.)