Dad sneaking a Smoke

I'm posting another series. I was happy with the last one. This one will be a little different.
Part 1 of 3

Cold War Kids "Hang Me Up To Dry"

Music is a great shorthand. Songs are just choruses for different times in our life. You hear a song and even if most of the details are fuzzy and washed out it brings you back to your old life, who you were with and how you felt about things.

I heard this song in the morning when my iTunes was on shuffle and it took me back to my last semester at St. Andrews - revising for exams, getting accepted to do my first professional degree, my friends at the time who I still see every few months and a few girls I'm happy to never see again, but I'll get back to that. It was just one of those big transition points in my life, both exciting and scary. It's maybe because of that, because I was more sensitive, more unsure about my life, that music became that much more important. When people ask what kind of music I listen to I usually say, "Everything." They usually assume I'm one of those people who are indifferent, so anything will do. I'm the exact opposite. I really care. I thought about it the other day and I must listen to music about 8 hours a day. I listen to every genre and I'll give anything a shot. Even piping. My favorite music at any time just depends on my mood, my energy and what I have going on in my life - what music will help me through it. Right now it's really heavy electro - anything that's this close to making my bass explode and ceiling crack - so obviously my body is telling me I need to go clubbing.

This song was definitely therapy for me. It was summer, I was just about done with my honours project and it went really well, like REALLY well. I was spending my time slowly writing up my dissertation at the library and going to the beanscene for some procrastination and espresso with anyone I knew who was equally bored at the lib. I had also just sort of started seeing someone. We kept it so casual, but at the same time it was incredibly intense. I think we were both waiting for the moment when the other would break down - give in. Games, right? Pleasure delaying, power struggles, sex used as a weapon. You'd almost think you could win. It ended badly. We weren't surprised. This song sounded exactly like I felt, exhausted, worn out, used up, done. 2 months of sun and fun torn between Beijing, Athens and Copenhagen made me forget all about it until just now. No regrets though. Not one.

my blip
Here's my dad sneaking a smoke at his new house in Ekali. It's the closest thing I have to a hometown so I'm really happy my parents moved back. It's also a sick house. It's really old with high ceilings, wood and tile floors and a huge garden all around it. There are few like it left in the neighborhood. I'm happy to call it home and only 3 weeks until I'm back!

Kiev 88cm
Arsat C 80mm
Shanghai GP3 100
Rodinal 1:25 10min

posted 06/03/2011
from Benbecula, UK