Wow

One minute its all peaceful. I stopped off at Hartsholme Park for a sly mooch and some fresh air, and I spotted a duck coming towards me, sun glistening off the cool water. 'Great' I thought, 'a blip'.

Then what happened? A gang of seagulls suddenly pounced all mob handed and it all went off. There were birds everywhere, shouting about and posturing ready for this massive ruck. I reckon some were tooled up, and not one was a genuine park bird: these birds were here for the action. It's sad when a day at the lake turns into a mass brawl between our sky huggers, but there we go. I did hang around to see if I could bag a duck or two (got some Hoy Sin sauce at home. tasty), but the ducks beat a retreat and not one life was lost. Phew.

What else has happened? Clearly not much if I have to make up stories about birds fighting. Last night I had an early one, this morning I (inadvertently) had a late one and all day I've been working my love eggs off just to get people trained.

The sex people contacted me today saying it was nice to meet us and we should go round and get mashed one night. I hope that's not literal. However they did ask my mate Jamie to go as well: Perhaps the guy wants some Jamie action and is planning on leaving me with the curly haired princess. Mind you he added me on Facebook to and his status mentioned worming horses - not really my scene that. I did have horse once though in France. Tasted a bit like beef that had gone off. I doubt worms would add to the flavour.

Shit its 5.04pm and I'm still at my desk. Therefore tonight I shall have to leave you light on laughs.