Oh So Naked...

So I'm pretty confident in saying I've seen everything. And when I say "everything," I mean everything.

I think the best moments in life are the ones where I just think to myself, "Wow, you can't make this shit up!" If I were to write a book on all the times I've thought to myself, "only me..." I could have such a best seller on my hands, one of the year's most hilarious books, but no one would be able to believe it was 100% fact.

So here's what happened this morning:
My alarm went off 4 times (waking me up from the most amazingly constructed dream world where I can find faith and love and adventure most every night) when I finally roll out of bed and into the shower. As the water pressure evens and the steam rises I lather, rinse, repeat--like most hair fanatics, I have too fallen for the cosmetic companies' scheme of telling consumers to unnecessarily waste twice as much shampoo and conditioner even though my hair is completely free of debris the first time I lathered and rinsed. I hop out of the shower and into a towel and continue on with my day, making a metal note that I'm almost out of shampoo and conditioner.

So as I go to start doing my hair, I see the chance for a perfect Blip opportunity; figuring nothing else exciting was going to happen today (boy was I wrong). So I fidget with my digital trying to get it just right, snap some shots, and capture a striking picture that I think will do just fine as my Blip of the day. Feeling accomplished, I continue on with my morning routine.

Just as I finish getting dressed, I get this psychic-like premonition that my mother is choking. Sure enough about 5 seconds later she is sprinting upstairs gasping for breath. Now I don't know if you've ever heard a loved one choking before, but it becomes the scariest and most God-awful sound in the world. So I wrap my arms around my mother trying to dislodge whatever foreign object is in her throat as she is trying to walk away from me trying to go downstairs....AND she's still choking! "Um, hellooooo I'm trying to save you!"

And as if that weren't enough, here comes my brother. Fortunately for her, he had woken up to the sound of her running upstairs choking and jumped into action. Unfortunately for me, he was sleeping without anything on...nothing. I don't know how long it will take to get the image of my streaking brother running past me in our narrow hallway to go catch our choking mother out of my head. Or, for that matter, how long it will take me to get over the awkward moment my brother and I had while he was on his way back to his room after rescuing our mother when I covered my eyes because I didn't want to see anything and he just giggled.

Needless to say, my morning was filled with unexpected surprises. But a Happy Friday to everyone and I hope yours started with a lot more clothing.

Definition of irony:
incongruity between what is expected to be and what actually is, or a situation or result showing such incongruity
Example: My mother choked on an asprin.
Better Example: My mother choked on an asprin and was in pain all day.