Moving on

A pleasant morning spent with a friend Nicolas at a children's market in Bradford. Came away with organic strawberry jam, a bracelet (made by the kids themselves) for my mum & a home made keyring from my friend - 'Best friends forever'.

Spent the afternoon in Leeds where I took this blip outside a 'legal highs' shop!

More like Amsterdam than Leeds!

My mum called in the afternoon as a close friend of hers who was only in her 50's passed away today (brain cancer) which was obviously distressing for her & me.

No one likes to see their loved ones upset. Perhaps dying is the easy part. It's those left behind who have to carry the pain off loss which does of course ease over time but it's no consolation at the time. It's difficult to know what to say, all you can do is be there & let them know you are and always will be!

It's important to remember those who are no longer with us for what they brought to the world, their legacy has nothing to do with material possessions, sometimes it's just a smile, a wise word or two, an infectious laugh or a shared history.

I think like the lesson of 'Its a wonderful life' we little realise how far the smallest of our actions ripple through the world and affect others in ways which are life changing.

I'm not very good at coping with loss & I have to remind myself that the harshness of life is balanced by immense beauty & moments of grace.

The Egyptians were a little obsessed with death & the other side if there be such a thing.

I'm still on the fence, I like the Buddhist idea that we are like shining raindrops, that we live an illusion of separation & eventually we slip back into the oneness of the ocean from whence we came.

My favourite poem at times like this is by Mary Elizabeth Frye (1932). It's similar to the idea that we go back to the place we came from in this case back to the mystery of nature:

Do not stand at my grave and weep
I am not there. I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow.
I am the diamond glints on snow.
I am the sunlight on ripened grain.
I am the gentle autumn rain.
When you awaken in the morning's hush
I am the swift uplifting rush.
Of quiet birds in circled flight.
I am the soft stars that shine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry;
I am not there. I did not die.

I do wish life were easier sometimes but then I suspect somehow we would then be missing the point.