hahahahahha

Got up early this morning and travelled up to fremantle, they have a phenominal old port there, if you could imagine Leith dockyards with all its old sheds and warehouses of a bygone era but rather than leave them all dilapidated and broken like we would in this country, they have converted them into trendy bars, shops, museums, ferry terminals and the like.

Spotted a large maritime museum that looked amazing. I never thought I would say that a museum looked amazing, but this one did on account that it had a proper large cold war submarine sitting outside it, what more reason to go.

Do you ever sit in the bath with the shower on and pretend you?re a submarine or is that just me ? You should try it tonight while making fire alarm noises and shouting Dive Dive?.

Unfortunately its not yellow, but it still looks cool so we are going to go back and do that tomorrow.

But the main reason for us being at the port was to get the ferry to rottnest island. I say ferry, but its not like the ferry back home with cars going on and off and tourists being sick on every deck. This was more like a ferry on steroids and looked more like an oversized speedboat. It was jet water propelled like a jet ski would be and this thing seriously shifted.

Apparently they have a service during the summer months that goes twice as fast and you have to get strapped in to stop you from falling out of it, but that wasn?t available to us. Gutted

Cost the small fortune for the ferry crossing but it was worth every penny, or you could have offset the American global debt or provided grain to a third world country or built a well or something. However, once again I digress.

We got there and the island was stunning, it was once used as a prison ( was all of Australia really just one big prison ?) except this one was for the abooos?.

Theres lots of merit in sticking your criminals on an island though, it?s a pity wales isn?t an island.

Dad decides that he wanted to go snorkling and we hire the relevant equipment and head off to a stunning bay simply called the basin on account that it was the shape of a washing basin and the beach suddenly fell down a plug hole. The water was as blue as the sky was and he waddles himself in with his flippers on. He convinces me that the water is warm but having not brought my swimming trunks with me I am forced to strip to my calvins and get in the water.

Thanks dad, you lying old toe rag, its freezing, its almost as cold as the swimming pool at Nitton on the bing. I swim about until most of my extermities goes numb. I think of that bit in crocodile Dundee, when he goes ?struth, that blokes a shiela? and if I got any colder I would have to have sat down to pee.

I make my excuses and get out the water as I want to use our only towel that we have brought before dad uses it to get my revenge for lulling me into the water.

I am just getting my shoes on when some Japanese tourists turn up, I am a little concerned that they will try to harpoon him and greenpeace warrior is nowhere in sight. Luckily I remember that the island is a protected nature reserve and that the Japanese party were on the whale watching tour boat that came in after the ferry docked. This explains why they are taking pictures of him splashing around in the water making noises that sounds like a wounded sea lion.

It?s the kind of panic splashing that attracts sharks, plus he has a blister on his large toe which may or may not still be bleeding, so we have agreed that if he gets eaten by a shark that I should keep taking pictures.