Smiling and shining, I opened the van door. Faces of dear friends greeted me, my heart was full and at peace with these people. I sat down next to a dear friend who had a look of worry on his face.

"What's wrong Sadik?" He mumbled something with a defeated voice and looked out the window purposefully avoiding my eyes. Confused like a child with a tinge of wonder I scanned the heads that proceeded mine. Each head I could name without given the face. All was in place, except one. "Where is Ammar?", I asked Sadik. Like a father about to watch his child's heart break, Sadik opened his mouth reluctantly and delicately met my eyes.

"He's not here, Brooke. He left this morning. He knew you coudn't handle saying goodbye, so he made me promise not to tell." Then something in me snapped. Blood rushed to my ears, and I could feel the scream building inside of me. I had to get out.

"Stop the van, stop it, I need to get out, I need out!" With a voice I didn't recognize as my own. I peeled the seatbelt off of my chest, and fought for the door. I jumped out, while the van was moving. I breathed in air, there was a pause in the chaos. Then I started running, the scream was growing and I could feel its weight. Friends with concern were chasing after me, but I was in transit. There was no particular destination, my feet were just moving, I needed to run. Away. In my craze I tripped over myself. As I descended to the ground I screamed. It was a scream that embodied the realization that I might never get home to you. I closed my eyes as my scream and falling body smacked the ground.

Then I woke up.