Is there anything else I can help you with?

Ordered my new iPhone as you'll know from my shot in Windsor. I received a transcript of my Chat session about a problem with the delivery, which on reflection, I have found most amusing. I thought I could share it with you......

O2 : Hi. How can I help?
me: Hi - there is an order on my account on-xxxxxxxx and the deliveryaddress is given as : xxxxxxxxxxx This is not me.

O2: Okay.
me: I tried to order online on 17th. Seemed to hang the order. When I got a text through, I guessed it had registered. Now the delivery address is as above, which is not mine.

O2: So is it that it needs to be changed
me: Should be yyyyyyyyyyyyy

O2: As the order is already dispatched from our warehouse, you'll need to contact the courier and change it to your new delivery address.
me: ? me? But my delivery address has not changed. how about we cancel the order?

O2 : Is there anything else I can help you with?
me: Did I miss something? have you helped me yet??

O2 : I'd suggest you to have the address changed and then if you want to cancel, you can send the order back to us within the 14 day cooling period and you send the order back, you can call the upgrades team and cancel this order.
me: But why do you have a random address on my account? I don't even know this address in Cheshire. It is an O2 error, not mine, I suggest you you have the address changed, not me, before someone in cheshire picks it up or accepts delivery. Then where will you be!?

O2: I do not have the authorization to call the courier as the order is under your account name and details. Its only you who can have the delivery address changed and authorised.
me: ? This is not my delivery address. I don't know where it came from. I did not provide it to you. You (O2) have invented this address not me. I have not changed my delivery address on my account, this is not my error.

O2 : i do understand what your saying that it is not an error on your side, but to cancel the order and have it sent back to us you'll have to call the courier and change your account delivery address.
me:: You have sent this out via the courier, not me. You labelled the parcel, not me. They are your couriers, not mine. if this remains uncollected, when do they return it to you? If this gets collected, the how will you get it back??? then how will you get it back???

O2 : if the order is refused at the delivery address given then it will come back to us.
me: If the order is accepted at the delivery address or collected, then it is not my address and not me collecting it. Therefore this order will not have been fulfilled and I do not accept responsibility for retrieving the goods nor liability for the contract.

O2: For this reason i'm requesting you to change your delivery address. or else you'll be charged for the order. You need to changed the address and when it come to you , you need to refuse the delivery.
me: I DID NOT PROVIDE YOU WITH THIS ADDRESS! THE ADDRESS ON MY ACCOUNT IS CORRECT. THIS DELIVERY ADDRESS ON THE ORDER IS NOT MINE!

O2 : When you refuse the delivery it will be sent back to us. you'll need to call us after 7 working days and cancel the order.
me: BUT THIS IS NOT ME, nor was it PROVIDED BY ME! THIS IS SOMEONE ELSE

O2 : if you don't want to change the address i'd suggest you to call 202 free from your pay monthly phone and speak to the upgrades team.
me: The address on my account is correct! I don't want to change it. It's the address on your parcel that is incorrect! Please send me a transcript of this chat.

O2 : Are you there ?
me: I am.

O2 : Is there anything else I can help you with?
me: In what way have you helped me?

O2 : Is there anything else I can help you with?
me: ?

O2 : Bye. Happy Christmas

Needless to say, I contacted the courier, who told me only O2 could change the address on an order. Of course the next agent couldn't understand why the first had suggested I could change the address with the courier. Funny that.