Amends

There's something very good about reviewing your childhood from an adult perspective. Especially the part about the assumptions we made, as a child, about the adults in our lives. As children, we never had 100% of the information. We didn't know our parents before they gave birth to us. We didn't know the hopes and dreams they never voiced while laying down those dreams to pour their time and energy into our lives. We were born demanding food, diapering, cuddling, warmth, and all the things we couldn't provide for ourselves. We occupied our parents lives and we made so many assumptions based on our limited knowledge, then we were angry if they didn't meet up with our expectations.

Today, we see through grown up eyes. We see that we were only a part of their puzzle and they had their own parents, from whom they sought to meet their own needs, before ever offering their lives up to raise us. We see they didn't 'hide' information from us, they simply had a right to choose not to tell us everything. We see they had needs and wants too, and sometimes they kept those things private while we assumed too much about who they were.

Today, we make amends for the child within who assumed too much, expected too much, demanded too much. For the child within who thought they were the center of the universe, perhaps, was treated poorly at times, but really was treated well far more often.

**We sat in a Rehab Center, a Nursing Facility, fighting sleep together, the three of us. Mother Comfort, no more drowsy than Paul and I. It seemed the building pulled all the energy from us as we tried to bring Christmas cheer to one another. My sister's appearing for a moment was like that of an angel to me. She brought Christmas cheer into the room in an instant (along with a few lovely cookies) and distributed lovely hugs!

The Dietary Director was the actual cook today, and the food was fabulous! How kind of her to give of her time on Christmas while her husband came in and sang Christmas carols with the residents while dinner was cooking.

I think Mother Comfort was eager to see us go, just so she didn't have to fight sleep any longer. We made our way to her home once again, and we continued our journey through time as we sorted through to separate the useful from the no longer useful things that had become barriers to peaceful living. There is a time when things just become a road block to the future. Too many of them begin getting in the way of where you will put your next step.

We took a little time for ourselves to see Sherlock Holmes at the end of the day, with a visit to my mom and dad before coming home. All in all, as lovely a day as it could be.