Straight from the horse's mouth.

The Frenchman, Oooh! The Frenchman, I still shudder at the thought of him.

(For those not in the know, the story starts here.)

The Frenchman was at the Farm Sale buying quantities of old machinery and horse drawn carriages, including the glass sided hearse, because he is a stunt rider and provides horses, riders and props for film and TV.

It transpired that he actually lives quite close to me.
We kept in touch, he was a keen texter, and eventually we met for a drink.

He was very charming, his voice was like liquid gold, and his accent was to die for - still very French, even though he had been living in England for more than 20 years. Strangely though, there was a slight aroma of creosote wood preserver about him that I found slightly off-putting and couldn't work out, surely it wasn't a new brand of aftershave?

He invited me to his farm to have a look at some of the horses being trained.
I went.
He had recently built himself a new wooden house, and that explained the eau de creosote, the whole place reeked of it!!!

It was a rather strange place with dwellings and stables interspersed and a large performance arena, where you could dine and watch a show - although you'd have to be hardy as it was freezing cold and rather ramshackle.

There were horses everywhere, mostly Iberians, because they have the right temperament for stunt and show work. There were also miniature horses, donkeys and mules out in the fields.

"Come I 'av somesing verry, verry special to show you, come!"

"Come in here, zis is my wonderful stallion, ee likes zee ladies, come see him close"

I went into the stallion's stable with The Frenchman.

I have some experience of horses and am not nervous of them in general, although stallions can be very difficult and sometimes dangerous if not handled properly.

"Ere, pat 'im on the neck, ee likes you"

"Do you like 'im?"

I patted the stallion on the neck and he became quite edgy, the alarm bells in my head started to ring.

"I sink ee likes you a lot, I sink ee sinks you are sexy..."

There was a flash of clarity in my head.

"Oh no. Absolutely no! I'm off."

If you haven't worked out what was being suggested, Google 'Catherine the Great Horse'.

I was so shocked that I left immediately and have never returned.

Next time you see a period drama on TV with horses and carriages, the likelihood is that The Frenchman will have be involved and you'll think of me speeding away from him!!!

Foot note.
If you have seen the Spielberg film 'War Horse' based on the Michael Morpurgo novel of the same name, the majority of the horses were supplied by The Frenchman.
Any equestrian buffs amongst you will have noticed that there were many Iberian horses in the cavalry charge, which would not have been in the UK at that time. It was hunters and draft horses that were actually requisitioned during the Great War.

I should like to thank my friend's horse, George, for providing the perfect image!