Hello Santa

Every year I throw out hints for a chocolate Santa, and every year JR obfuscates, but one appears on the day, no - actually, before the day. Mostly, I ask, 'Was it two for one?' and she says, 'No' and then the second Santa appears a day or two later.

This year I had my Christmas Day Santa, but that was my lot. Last night there was a yelp (but not from Archie) and a chocolate Santa - suddenly remembered - was produced from behind a pot plant! Yippee!

Archie looks hopeful, but sorry, Arch - not good for dogs. Not much good for humans either, come to that...

I made myself do the hoovering today before I sat down with him. My theory is to get rid of any chocolate in the house as quickly as possible, thereby removing temptation, and the diet can begin. I jest, but it's really not funny at all. I've put on so much weight over this last year, and I can't blame it all on the pills. (But I do).

Archie has reverted to puppyhood of late, and has added slippers to his list of illicit thrills (tissues, letters, magazines, remote controls, socks and the biggest challenge - my hat). Possibly because his mums are late risers in the holidays, and so he gets a wee bit bored waiting for some action. New insoles for my slippers needed today.

Right. Santa gone. Feel slightly sick.

Diet started.