Good Grief 324

Work in progress ...https://www.blipfoto.com/entry/2373971194161400585

I was told to try and take some of my leave which is building up so booked today off. I had a plan of sorts and managed to get going. When I stopped for petrol the man ahead of me in the front of the queue to pay looked just like P from the back and had a top on just the same. I always liked him in that top. I wanted to touch the back of his neck and run my hand through his hair. The man turned. It wasn't him, of course. He wasn't beautiful P. Of course. It's the left field, unexpected bolt out of the blue. I fought back a choke and tears and developed an intense interest in the ceiling wiring and bit my lip.

I was soon stuck behind a double recycling wagon. There was much impatience behind me with folk trying to overtake. I didn't want to though. I was too entranced by the backdraft created by the lorry which was making the golden leaves dance and catch the sun. I followed it for many miles and was reluctant to part company when it headed into the depot.

Once at my walking destination I had something of a minor panic attack when I realised I'd forgotten my camera. It made me realise how much it has become part of what I do and what helps to motivate me to at least get going and look.

It seemed ridiculous. Surely I can walk for walking' sake? I cracked on and looked up at the trees and thought of my absurdity. Those trees don't approach their day wondering what to blip. I can't see many trees thinking, 'That human will make a great blip'. Or, 'I'll take a photo to make my day meaningful'. I might be wrong, of course.

As on Sunday, it was mainly a case of one foot in front of the other. Fresh air and exercise. I wondered why I'd gone but it was beautiful. Just wish I had more in me to be grateful.

I cried and headed on south to my destination and cried some more. Bloody wearing.