Kings Day 2018

It been a hard week this week, tired, shit at work etc so I wasn't even sure I was going to go tonight. 

Normally it's something I really look forward to, but the tiredness, plus the mental strain of the job meant it had been pushed to the back of my mind. It rained all day, and I was so glad when the weekend finally came.

I went home and got ready, deliberated a bit about which train to take, and then left to catch the 5:30pm. Truth be told I was a little hesitant to go into town- I actually have been since February, but maybe doing it is the best way to face your fear and so I ploughed on.

When I got there, I headed to the pub on autopilot, telling myself that if there was a huge queue in the rain then I probably would bail and go home. I was pleasantly surprised to find a queue of only about 10 people, under the nice canopy which was good as the weather was freezing and a bit drizzly! And before I knew it, I was inside, back into the familiar scent of beer and the noise of the Dutch music. 

It turned out to be a really good night. M was DJing until 2am, but I knew I wouldn't make it that late- this old lady is craving her bed much earlier these days! 

The nicest part was catching up with M, who has now moved back home to NL. It's only been a couple of months since he left, but it feels a bit strange that he's no longer down the road any more. He seems happier and it sort of made me question my own situation again and wonder if I could only take the leap, then I too might be happy, and released from my own prison! 

We shall see. We're doing a second night tomorrow so I had better rest up ;-)