Saturday

My (not so) little one did really well on the bass guitar at orchestra today. Some days he's more enthusiastic about joining in than other days. It all depends on his levels of anxiety. This morning I worked very hard at reducing said anxiety and it paid off. It's tiring for me though. Always needing to be one step ahead and anticipating possible triggers for his demand avoidance. I have to choose the words I use carefully and keeping facial expressions calm helps.

If he decides to avoid demands it is very intense. It can mean not going out and it can mean that I bear the brunt of his anxiety related behaviours. A demand can be merely perceived by him. So for instance if he thinks he ought to be doing something it can be just as bad as if he is actually expected to do something. His need to be in control is profound. The outbursts can come from nowhere and his mood can spiral downwards rapidly.

He's an extraordinary young man. Underneath all that complicated is a talented musician.

The photo was taken in my garden this afternoon.

Me time.