The Clachnaharry Thunderer.....

.... is bang on time: "We are now arriving at Clachnaharry," shouts the guard, "alight here for herons, stupendous views, and the last pub before Norway. Next stop, Inversneckie."

I had already alighted for some Clachnaharry therapy. It won't solve everything, but it eased my worries a little. They should put a sign up, on the green, saying: 'Chillout zone. Don't worry. Watch the swallows.Relax.'