Goodbye Kiki

Today was a hard day. I sat with Kiki in the morning, she kept me company whilst I read the lovely comments people had left for her. I actually fell back asleep with her beside me, I cuddled her and held her paw, it was so comforting. I ended up sleeping this way until noon, one last nap with my girl, I think I needed it. Mathew came round with Sylvie in the afternoon to drop of the key to their place. He said we could use their garden to bury Kiki, we did not want to put her in our garden and I did not like the idea of cremation. We had a good few hours with them, Sylvie was so interested the bunnies, she kept hugging and kissing them.

After they left we bundled Kiki up and drove to Matt and Vicky's house. I carried her on my lap, one last car journey, she'd always loved looking where we were going in the car. We had been to the garden centre the day before and bought Ilex 'Little Rascal' a small holly shrub, we thought the name was perfect for Kiki. We planted the 'little rascal', as well as some daffodils and crocuses, some beautiful spring colour for my girl.

It was hard coming home knowing she's not here. The past few days were awful, but it made it easier having her here for a few days, giving me time to say goodbye. Now she's not here and it feels so real, she's not coming back. I can't cuddle her or stroke her fur, she won't lick my face or dig me again. It feels so empty without her, Hubert seems to feel the same way, he has just been moping about, he looks terribly sad. Thankfully we have the other buns to keep him company, he needs some friends to look after him just now, we will hopefully start that process tomorrow.