Sister Wendy and the upward spiral

Wonderfully lazy start to the day; breakfast in bed, reading, playing with the cats.

Went to Ikea late afternoon - queues of traffic getting to Wembley and queues to get out of the store. Plus ca change.

Very nice time tonight with our friends Mr and Mrs A - curry and then a coffee back at their place.

It's funny but when you have little time on your hands (as you sometimes do at this time of year), you think about things more deeply than you do when caught up in the maelstrom of work and daily routine. Today I have been thinking a lot about how our society is obsessed with outcomes and "results". But people like process. If all food was free in restaurants, people would still like to cook because they want the process not just the end result. More to the point, they like processes that they enjoy. Whether it is photography, cooking, painting, or anything else, it is the enjoyment of the act of creation as much as the final result that matters. Our society is obsessed with outcome, in much the same way that it is obsessed with economic growth, regardless of whether people are happy with having more and more. This despite the fact that all of the research into happiness and wellbeing shows that it is experience not possessions that makes people happy and fulfilled. It is also true that active pursuits rather than passive pursuits bring more fulfilment. For instance photography, painting, sport, anything that is active are all ultimately more fulfilling than watching television.

The second important component of a positive experience is sharing it with other people. Even going to the theatre or cinema are better than TV because you have the shared experience, the sense of laughing and gasping together at what is happening on screen; but when you combine something active with something shared you begin to really enjoy yourself. One of the highlights of 2012 for me was a day spent at a vegetarian cookery school in Bath; it was a great experience with a small group of people we had never met before, and the end result (a beautiful middle eastern dinner for 12 people) was wonderful.

These principles are also key to a fulfilling work life. My most positive experiences of work in the past could be described in exactly the same terms as I have just described my cooking experience: something I want to do, involving a great team of people, with a good end result. But let's not talk about work ...

There is however one slightly different but not incompatible perspective. The famous Sister Wendy, reclusive nun but suddenly much lauded TV art critic, was heavily featured in The i last week (Wednesday 26th December) for reminding us all of what we should already know: that we are losing the capacity for quiet, inward contemplation. We spend so much of our lives being entertained that we don't make time for our inner voice. She calls it prayer, others call it meditation, and you might call it introspection. Whatever you call it, the idea is that going out into the world each morning is best done on the basis of having had some time each day to think of others, your actions, and the world around you; just how thoughtful and mindful are you in the way you are living your life, whether you are cooking, helping someone with a problem, or standing in a supermarket queue?

So if I have a New Years resolution it is probably just to remind myself of the above ... Knowing yourself, creativity and people get you through to the end result. Whatever that is for you. As the NLP guys say, the more you do the better equipped you become; it's an upward spiral.