Garden pests and how to treat them

Ivanka Trump is a fairly recent addition to the list of invasive species that can cause problems for any gardener. First discovered at a G20 summit, this pest likes to establish itself in warm bullshit between deeply rooted world leaders. Fortunately most of us don’t have this problem although a pale pink variety can sometimes end up anywhere in the Western Hemisphere if the cameras are pointing in the right direction and you don’t shut your browser page down quickly enough. Fortunately little action is needed as they tend to self destruct on attempting to flower and are reduced to a small pile of Internet memes that get washed away during the next ‘round of political satire.

Gardening and the great outdoors were very much my bag today. I dug, I planted, I tilled and uprooted, mowed and made beautiful. We did find time for a picnic at Newlands corner, which was glorious, and then a trip into Guildford for rehydration, shopping and toenail painting.

Good day.