sad to say goodbye

i dont want to. i dont want to say goodbye. up until today i felt great peace about going home and anxiety about staying here. today i just feel anxiety about everything. i just want to be here, i dont want to leave. i know its scary and unknown here, but that is exciting. and there are such wonderful people here and such wonderful things to do. i find peace in going home by acknowledging that my time here has been a gift, and i dont deserve to stay here. i am so thankful that i was granted these 4 months. and i dont want to seem ungrateful by just wanting more of it. but it would be so good to stay. i could learn a lot more german, and equally important, continue to eat superb food. ha.

i guess i just know that i am not returning home to anything. its not like i have a job there. i guess i need to get back to real life, but i like this life. blah blah blah...

there are hints of spring here. which grant me great hope.

we moved the kitchen and the living room today. the aftermath is sarah in her eagle creek. spenc with his german books, and me with my beer. it was pretty spectacular.

this is a photo of the reichstag.