Quite difficult

Today started at 2am for me. The youngest wildling was sick again last night and then awake from 2-6 with a temperature and a sore throat. She doesn't liked to be touched or cuddled through the night when unwell. I managed to grab half hour at 6 and Mr R got up with the boy's.

The biggest wildling was filled with anxiety when I got up. He didn't want to go to school. But this is normal for him to say. And that he has a sore tummy every day. It is so hard to tell what is wrong with him. He can't explain his feelings. We managed to get him half dressed and then it was like the world had exploded. In all the years working with children and seeing autistic children have meltdowns we have never witnessed anything like this morning. It was like he went into a full on breakdown. Now we could have kept him at home but if we did that we would never get him back to school. I'm glad the neighbours are understanding as the whole street heard him today and my heart broke for him. The closer we got to school the worse he became. It took 3 of us to get him out and in the end I had to go and sit in the office with him for 40 minutes.
If this was a adult then they would have been medicated or sectioned. That is how bad this was. His poor heart.
What anger's me though is that our local cahms will not see a child until they are 6. In fact you cannot be referred to them until the child is 6 and then it can be a year wait. Our pediatrician agrees that he needs to be seen for anxiety. There has been so many cuts to this department and I know families who are being denied help because there is no staff. And these families are at breaking point, a couple of children are suicidal and still they cannot get the help. This saddens me and anger's me .

You break a bone, you get it fixed. But when it comes to mental health it's the complete opposite. The nhs is at breaking point and it might only get worse if the Tories have a say.

I remember the day's where I use to survive on very little sleep, but today I'm exhausted. I look forward to bed.

We're already dreading tomorrow as he's adamant that he's not going to school. We will see what tomorrow brings. For now it's their dinner, bath and bed.