Following the rules!

Let himself off the lead and we both kept to the statutory distance!
Blue skies & sun so we took ourselves and the doggies for a walk and to put some distance between us and the constant media gloom & doom.
Walking along and my mobile rings.
"Good afternoon" says a chirpy Glaswegian voice
"In view of the current world situation!! we are wondering that as you fall into the 65 plus age group, have you made plans on how to pay for  your funeral"
Normally I tell them to get tae **** but the sun was out & I needed some mental stimulation so what the heck
"Im not planning on dying anytime soon" I tell the chipper weegiee
"Well do you know the cost of an average funeral today is four thousand pounds"?
"Really? But Im not planning on dying TODAY"
(forced laughter) " NO seriously, do you really want to possibly die and leave your family with the burden to pay?"
"Son , you either die or you don't!! You don't  "possibly die" "make your mind up"
(getting less chirpy)
"Well surely you don't wish to lumber your children with the financial burden "
"well if I die, I would hope my better half would pay "
"normally, but circumstances at the moment are very different and he might also get the virus"
"he bloody better not! and by the way Im no 65 plus, Im 65 minus"
That threw him a little but not much
"You do indeed sound much younger"
"Well I am, I married a sugar daddy so you should really be speaking to him" (Donald was listening to this on the speaker and said in Gaelic "tell him to get tae ***)
" Is your husband foreign?"
"yes, we're refugees, just fled on a RIB from Ghiga"
"Im sorry madam but we only supply arrangements to British Nationals"
End of call!!!
Seriously! is there no end these greedy bar stewards will not  go to to part folks from their cash!

The rest of our walk was uneventful.