Landscape

If you’d told me a while back that PMQs would become must see TV I’d have thought you were deranged, but watching Bozo get pulverised week after week is never getting old.

He is spectacularly under prepared, seems to have no grasp of detail, and walks into traps that a toddler could see coming. I have no desire to help him, but surely an adviser who is a genius in his own mind could drum some basics into him to save humiliation:

1. If Kier uses some figures, don’t dispute them because they will be your figures; usually ones you read out at a briefing the day before while your mind was elsewhere.
2. Lawyers don’t ask questions where they don’t know what the correct answer is. They are hoping to catch you out in a blatant lie and will have the evidence to hand if you make stuff up.
3. If you ask Kier a question he has read all of his notes, thinks quickly on his feet, and will have an answer. So for gods sake don’t lob the ball right to him so he can smash it in your gormless face.

Best moment this week was Bozo challenging Kier to come up with a single country that had a functioning app (following another expensive failure spaffing £12M up the wall with his vote leave mates on a bodge job) “because he won’t be able to”.

Following a perfectly timed beat - “Germany”.

Priceless.