Faith

"Could a greater miracle take place than for us to look through each other's eyes for an instant?"
(Henry David Thoreau)

A wee miracle happened to me today. Just a wee one, but it has been enough to restore my faith in human nature, and also faith in myself (a little, anyway - not my strong point).

Imagine, as a successful business owner, being faced with a potential employee. On your list of requirements for your candidate, you likely wouldn't include:

(1) a history of mental health issues - OCD, anxiety, depression.
(2) a debilitating condition (fibromyalgia) which, the sufferer openly admits, often makes them unreliable due to flare-ups of pain and exhaustion.
(3) being 'let go' by the council due to a year-long absence from work (related to 1&2).
(4) references unavailable due to leaving last employment because of prolonged bullying by the line manager.

On paper, this potential employee is a nightmare...

Unemployable
Unreliable
A 'fruit loop'
Hypochondriac
Flakey
Too emotional
A liability
Incompetent.

Even if I had had a history of mental health issues myself, as an employer, I would have difficulty employing this person. Totally understandable.

But the miracle happened. I got the job.
That's me, up there. I hate reading it.
It makes me ashamed, makes me want to crawl under the duvet and not come out again. It makes me question every single thing I do, every interaction I have, convinced I'm not good enough. Useless, worthless.

But I got the job.

They believe in me.
They think I can do it.
And so I must try to believe I can too :)

I got the job.


I'm so thankful for this chance.