Tomorrow's Headlines Today

My Dear Princess and Dear Friends,

I spent all of today working on a PowerPoint presentation. We have a Steering Group meeting on Friday and Shenée wants us all to do a bit on our bit. 

Not only that, but a healthy spirit of rivalry has emerged between us, over who can do the most entertaining PowerPoint. 

PowerPoint, as you know, is typically a boring tool of UTTER DREAD that is used to torture poor innocent employees as we watch n*bs drone on about sh*t while sitting in uncomfortable seats in a room that is too hot.

Such is my experience. See last week. My back is still stiff.

So Sam, Corrie and I have attempted to SUBVERT this trend by getting into PowerPoint battles over who can produce the most entertaining one. 

I say it is the three of us. As you might expect, it is ME who provides most of the childish trash-talk because I am me. But it has been fun. Sam's slides are things of beauty to look upon. They transition like broken glass or like pieces of paper screwing themselves up and throwing themselves away.

Corrie's meanwhile, incorporates something called "Dragon Ball Z" (she loves Japanese anime) to have us RACING each other to the finish line. Shenée would like us to stand up and shout our anime name ("AKIRAAAAA!!!") during her presentation, like we are in an actual cartoon. 

And then there's me. Because Shenée has been beaten up and battered by eejits at Kāinga Ora over "The Dom Post Rule", I thought I would grasp the nettle and put it right in their faces.

"The Dom Post Rule" comes up a lot in government here. It is the fear that the local newspaper (Dominion Post) will print a story about public funds being wasted. 

So when Shenée was trying to get $50k spent on posters, there was a lot of head-shaking and tut-tutting. "What if THE DOM POST got hold of this information???" they said. Oh no, no. Oh my. Oh no.

(Smock was a big fan of The Dom Post Rule, which says everything you need to know about it). 

Shenée pointed out that the technology costs $2M and that not to advertise it is like buying a Ferrari but not buying the keys, but honestly you would not believe the stress and time that $50k cost her.

Or maybe you would.

So I thought I'd do a slide about what might happen if we bought the tech but then forgot to do the Outlook booking side of things (which is what I'm primarily working on these days).

However, as you might expect, in my presentation it all turns out fine in the end and we get the headlines you see in the extra. Which I thought were quite funny.

I'm looking forward to what they make of THAT on Friday.

And p.s. it is SO ON, Sam and Corrie bahahahahaaaaaa.

S.