Friday

I went a walk with a friend this morning and en route pucked up my car keys from the garage. I left the car there as I'm still not focused and aware enough to drive yet.

The afternoon was on the sofa watching tv.

Later on Mum had said she wanted to take Steven  etc out for a meal for his birthday and I was invited. The way I saw it, it was a free meal as saving money is everything now. It was a nice meal and the boys were in good form. Lewis made this monster, Harris drew and chatted and then some how ended up with Kelly's lipsticks (extra). He is still enjoying playing with dolls buggies, wants to go to ballet , and often asks why boys can't wear make up!

I am really struggling with suicidal thoughts at the moment, my life has changed so much in the last few months and it's just so hard.