Play Misty for Me.....

LEO:

A brief liaison with Monty Don in February comes to an end when he overhears you criticising his Sticky Willy.

In a fit of pique, he dumps a ton of bamboo in your driveway, but undaunted, you set about recycling it into cutlery, toothbrushes and even underwear! Your enterprising nature will surely make you a fortune!

Sadly not. Come June, you discover that your house has an infestation of pandas. They eat all the bamboo blinds, bowls and bras, and worst still, make bloody great holes in the skirting boards!

Was this Monty's vengeful plan all along? Possibly....after all, what did you really expect from a man who grows Knobweed for a living?