Clematis ............

 ............... by the kitchen window.

Smile for the Day:

A Montana farmer was overseeing his animals in a remote mountainous pasture when suddenly a brand-new BMW advances out of a dust cloud toward him.
The driver, a young man in a handmade suit, Gucci shoes, Ray Ban sunglasses and YSL tie, leans out the window and asks the farmer,  "If I tell you exactly how many cows and calves you have in your herd, will you give me a calf?" 
The farmer looks at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looks at his peacefully grazing animals and calmly answers, "Sure, Why not?"

The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer, connects it to his Iphone and surfs to a NASA page on the Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite navigation system to get an exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo. 
The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop and exports it to an image processing facility in Hamburg, Germany. Within seconds, he receives an email on his Ipad that the image has been processed and the data stored. 
He then accesses a MS-SQL database through an ODBC connected Excel spreadsheet with email on his Blackberry and, after a few minutes, receives a response.

Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his hi-tech, miniaturized HP LaserJet printer and finally turns to the farmer and says, "You have exactly 1,586 cows and calves." 

"That's right. Well, I guess you can take one of my calves," says the farmer.  He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on, amused, as the young man stuffs it into the back of his car. 

Then the farmer says to the young man, "Hey, if I can tell you exactly what your business is, will you give me back my calf?"

The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, "Okay, why not?" 

"You're a Congressman in the U.S. government," says the farmer. "Wow, that's correct," says the yuppie. "But how did you guess that?" 
"No guessing required," answered the farmer. "You showed up here even though nobody called you, you want to get paid for an answer I already knew, to a question I never asked.  
You tried to show me how much smarter than me you are and you don't know a thing about cows. This is a flock of sheep. 
Now give me back my dog."


:o))



~ Anni ~



This is Monday 2nd uploaded on Tuesday 10th .....