Age

Once again posting some days after the event, I'm finally back home after this long bank holiday weekend. Something to do with her lady queenship's 70th birthday. I'm not entirely sure because I've enjoyed being completely offline, another advantage of only ever carrying an antiquated dumb phone. The relief from the current awful news cycle has been thoroughly refreshing. 

Now, talking of being antiquated, I have to say that the queen is looking rather old for her seventy years. I probably shouldn't have mentioned that! In polite society we don't tend to refer to people as being old for their age, although it's common and generally acceptable to refer to people as being young for their age.

I arrived back to find that yesterday's blip of Sheila Hancock had generated some discussion following Kendall having gently taken me to task for referring to one of our genuine national treasures as a young 89-year-old. After giving this a lot of thought (and thank you for that, K), I think I was guilty of lazy writing but possibly no more. I was alluding to the point that SH doesn't define herself by her age, which is the very point that Kendall herself was making. 

I believe there has been a massive generational shift around old age and our expectations from it. For my part, I don't hold to the stereotype of old meaning "stodgy and stuck in a rocking chair with a lot of conservative ideas left over from a distant youth". I've tended to think of age being a state of mind just as much as a state of body. There is undoubtedly still a lot of ageism in the world today, but along with so many other 'isms', they are gradually being eroded away. Whether it be in terms of age, gender or race, people are being seen more as the people they are, in respect to their own human individuality and uniqueness, rather than via labels.

Personally speaking, I'm happy to be called a young 66-year-old. I'm aware that I'm exceptionally fit for my age. I'm proud of that because it takes a lot of hard work but I'm also aware that there's a lot of luck involved too. Everything is relative. Our bodies do slow as they get older. Our minds get slower too. Being once of a particularly quick mind, as well as having been very quick of foot, I can bear testimony to that in very real terms. We can retard the decline, yet ultimately there is nothing we can do to stop it. I fight against that with a huge force of will but I no longer feel like I can change the world and my curiosity has dimmed. That's out of necessity. I don't have enough years left to remain curious about everything in this world. We're all on a trajectory from birth to death and I don't think it's wrong to describe some people as being younger than their physical years would suggest, in average terms, that they should sit on that path. That said, I'm open to suggestions for a better word to convey the meaning that I'm after and I think we all understand.

Sheila talked about the importance of her relationships with younger people. She goes to stand-up comedy gigs with her grandchildren and is in awe of the talent of these performers, especially the women. Having officially reached 'old-age' myself, I totally understand how important that relationship is. It's sadly undervalued. The young have a lot to offer to the older generation, just as I like to think that the opposite applies too. Ageism can be a barrier in both directions. I can certainly agree with Kendall that age is a label we should try to avoid. But when you come across someone like Sheila, so incredibly quick-witted and articulate, exuding so much passion for life, and so much rage, it's hard not to mention their age and their 'youthfulness' because it's inspiring and something that surely serves to break down any stereotypes. 

As for the journal on this day of the Queen's birthday - so much service, so much time being served that it's hardly surprising she looks nearer ninety than seventy - it was a day of travelling, E driving us back via Welshpool (thank you so much for all those hours behind the wheel) to Leeds, from where it was a bus (now free!) and a train to Ilkley.

It was a wonderful week spent between Brecon and Hay. Huge thanks are due to K for organising this trip, booking the accommodation a whole year in advance. It was a great honour to be invited into a very special group of people, a chance to make some new friends (D, S and M) as well as get to know more richly those I already considered as friends (R, T and N). K and A, you were already close friends and my respect for you both has grown even more. Everyone in the group has this irresistible curiosity about the world. It's humbling how much you all care. You're all truly inspiring people.