A moment of calm

In an otherwise bury day!  What had been planned as a catch up day turned out somewhat stressful.  The morning was ok, pottering in the bedroom and sorting things back into cupboards.  Just away at the moment not in any great order.

After lunch I had a project meeting, and also had been awaiting a district nurse since 17:00 yesterday so I stayed up to just after midnight and then didn't sleep well.  Dad had called me yesterday about Mum's ashes, and could I read the poem again, but he knew it was difficult for me so said I could pick a date and they'd work around it.  Minutes after that my sister phoned but I was otherwise busy so didn't answer.  Last week they both came here and were leaving the house without even acknowledging Mr T so I made them both at least shout up to say hello to him.  Everything has to be done done done now!  It's not that straightforward, but they just don't understand, or have any empathy.

Today Sarah was at my Dad's and they called as she had a list of dates she could do and I needed to pick one!  There and then.  So much for understanding.  Then Sarah dropped Dad her just before 13:00, 10 minutes before my project meeting.  A discussion ensued about how the vicar couldn't give any provisional dates (no answer to why can't he?)! and still waiting for a DN.  The lead researcher is amazing (autistic) but unbelievable at how she explains complicated topics, today was ethics, in such an understandable way.  I find I relate well with her and today one person was saying how his community had been the worst affected by the pandemic.. I felt I needed to say no one can claim to be the most affected, everyone has in different ways, and other people have health inequalities too, and that I struggle to get to the doctors of for exercise, and that has nothing to do with my ethnicity.  Vulnerable people and their carers still don't have anything like a normal life, and to say it's one group because of their ethnicity is positive discrimination.  A risk, but I was backed up by the lead researcher that it was a valid point and she was in the process of applying for funding to investigate how to include wider aspects of these health issues.

The DN arrived and was "inexperienced" (other adjectives may be applicable), and I could tell she wasn't confident.  I had to ask her to put a mask on which wasn't a good start.  To say she made a hash of it was an understatement.  Didn't get the catheter in first time, then I think bladder spasmed, so no urine but she inflated the balloon even though she shouldn't have done.  That caused pain, so out it came and in again.  No joy.  She kept asking me what she should do, and I was I a nurse as I gave her some advice.  By that point nothing was doing.  She then tried a third time but I asked her to use a new catheter (we don't need any more bacteria!) and she jabbed his prostate which then bleed profusely.  I said no way were we going to A&E again after the last time, so she called her boss who knew Mr T and said she'd come out.  The nurse went to take the rubbish out, got in her car and drove off!  The other nurse has now been promoted and she is one of the lovely ones, first time, no problem.  I asked her if she could let the first one have some feedback from the viewpoint of the patient/carer experience, for her learning, not as a complaint and not to dent her confidence.

A quick tour of the garden and spotted this beautiful visitor.  They can detect water from miles away!

And now chilling in my summer house, catching up (if I've missed any - sorry) and listening to the birds, brandy and coke.  Bliss!  Have now had messages from my sister and a friendly phone call from Dad ...  so there's my day in a nutshell.  A large one!

Thank you for all your lovely comments the last few days.  I'm not sure I'll get caught up on them all.  I'd rather catch up on your journals instead, but I do always read them. xx