How much does a polar bear weigh?

Enough to break the ice.

This is the birthday girls (pictured) attempt at meeting a man, that girl needs to get on match.com fast although I think they will come flocking if she purchases a mtv jumper!

Had a fab night considering it was spent in just one pub after I refused to pay 5 pound to get into a bar which would have closed an hour later. Although an absolute disgrace I was concerned I had ruined the evening as we trapsed back to the original pub. We regain positions at the table and carried on talking absolute drivvle.

"The little poo bits in the cul de sacs" in reference to colonic irrigation.

"I'd lick it for fifty quid" in reference to either a table or a random mans toe, I can't remember which.

A much needed great night out with great company. I will update again if I recall any other further funny moments.