Just a rose

As I watered the pots this evening.

Dog had me up half the night vomiting. He’s still not well, very subdued and looking sorry for himself. He’s slept all evening, so here’s hoping he sleeps tonight and is better tomorrow. 

Leanne came in for her review today, and she gave me a little glass angel. She believes in angels and the signs they bring and whilst I don’t, I struggled to hold back the tears, just because of the caring it meant. She wanted it to bring me comfort and as it’s small and flat I can carry it with me. I will, because for me it spells love. 

Nice to chat to Eileen tonight. Although I don’t set any store by dates, I do always seem to be very flat and miserable on Wednesdays. 7 weeks. He’s now been gone longer than he lived with the diagnosis. 

As I write that I realise that for the first time I feel a bit, just a bit angry! I am not and never have been an angry person but I feel very cheated and I’m angry that other peoples ineptitude and lack of care to detail cut his life short and left me without. 

Tomorrow will be a better day. I keep telling Liam ( who is better today having received news of a better weekend job), and now I must listen to myself.