Back Blip. Fancy Shoes!

To Jenny Joseph

Jenny, when I’m old I shall not wear purple
I shall wear pink, orange and red
and large leopard print spectacles
perched jauntily on my head
like those arty-farty women
that ooze confidence and pizazz
I’ll wear fancy shoes - not too high
and I’ll sashay to the sound of jazz
I shall visit art exhibitions and galleries
but I don’t want to see old masters
I want loud, gaudy, quirky art, not
statues with skin of alabaster
I’ll go out for posh afternoon tea 
at night I’ll have sausage and chips
followed by two cans of beer
by then I won’t care about my hips
I don’t need to learn to swear
I’m already quite good at that
from shaking my fist at PMQs
and cursing all them fat cats.
Jenny, I learnt a lot from your poem
about planning to be outrageous
as I’m sure many other women did
‘Warning’ has proved to be contagious!