The life of pensioner

Yes, spring has sprung, so there was a trip out and about -B&Q, Hopetoun Garden Centre, Port Edgar Chandlery. And as that coincided with OAP payment day, everything was free! I even renewed my Hearts Season Ticket. Gratis. I used to thank Rishi, now it’s thanks Rachel.
One thing that wasn’t so springy though was good self and my balance. No, not the bank balance as I’ve said, rather a little touch of the old benign paroxysmal positional vertigo. I went on manoeuvres to try and rid myself of it - the eply manoeuvre being a way of sorting it out. Unfortunately I then did a bit of overhead painting and found myself clutching the walls. Clearly not fixed. Nothing for it but to sit on the couch. Poor me! Whine whine whine. Pass the remote control, could you sweetie. And since you're on your feet, could you top up my glass?
I better get well soon or I'll be hung.