Ding dong, still going strong.....

& im losing it haha, hi guys hope this finds you well. Im ok I didn't get the bug. The day started ok with a nice walk with me Dave and Ash, I took the camera so I could get some autumnal shots. I did get a few good ones, but when I got back to the garden the roses had it, the colour and size were just lovely.

I made lunch then an old friend came round for an hour, it was time to walk Ash again by then, I was a little nervous if im honest I have been for a few days, I set off at 230 thinking that would give me 40mins before the school kids come out, I was wrong they came out early, I could hear them as I approached the corner and I froze :( I haven't felt like this in a long time now and I was going to call Dave to come and get me. But I thought if I did I would be back to wear I was a year ago. I waited till the first group passed then I went for it again, my hands went cold and clammy like they do when I'm nervous, my heart was beating hard, and I was scared but I did it and I got home. I didnt tell Dave right away but he was worried when I did.
The only reason I can think is because I have gained some weight back and it effects me greatly and what people think about me. Im going for a walk with Jan at 7 pm im sure I will be ok with her.

We are off to lakes on Thursday at 6am for two nights and Ash will be staying with Jan and Winnie I hate leaving him I feel so guilty I know he will be fine but we have a little routine and I will miss him greatly. We will drop him off at Jan's at 9pm tomorrow night :( He does normally go every where with us but this time its just not possible. Sorry for being a grouch guys.


love c x x x